Thursday, February 23, 2017



Multiple Responses
A is for A-Spot — Can You Find It?
Most of you have probably heard of the G-Spot, but the A-Spot is another exciting zone that can produce intense sexual pleasure as well as rapid lubrication and contractions in some women. Also known as the AFE (Anterior Fornix Erogenous) zone, this area of sensitivity is located at the deepest point of the vagina on the upper (anterior)  wall where it begins to curve upwards.

According to Malaysian researcher, Dr. Chua Chee Ann, who is credited with “discovering” the A-Spot, this sensitive area is located beyond the G-Spot just above the cervix. (The cervix is the narrow lower part of the uterus that protrudes into the vagina appearing as a circular or tube-like structure.) Check out the super-awesome Beautiful Cervix Project to learn more about what the cervix looks like.

How to find and stimulate the A-Spot: Dr. Chua’s research suggests that stimulation of the A-Spot can result in increased lubrication in women who experience vaginal dryness. He suggests inserting a clean, lubricated finger (trim those nails first!) into the vagina along the upper wall and reaching to the deepest point. While you’re in there, you can also move your fingers around to locate your cervix, which may feel round, rubbery and a bit firmer than the rest of the vagina.

Once you reach the deepest point of the vagina just above the cervix, Dr. Chua advises clients to continue stroking and applying pressure on this spongy area until you begin to lubricate. Then move your finger in an in-and-out motion along the upper wall including the G-Spot according to what feels good for you. Some women experience greater lubrication and more consistent arousal after stimulating this area for 5-10 minutes each day for at least a week. Though Dr. Chua claims that stimulation of the A-Spot can result in instant sexual arousal despite subjective feelings (stress, boredom, relationship troubles, etc.), I caution clients to use physical techniques like this one in conjunction with activities that promote relaxation, intimacy and improved communication. No physical technique alone can “solve” relationship issues or replace the power of  honest, open communication.

If you don’t find the A-Spot on your first try or if you do not experience pleasure or arousal, don’t worry – there are plenty of other hot spots on the wondrous female body and you still get an A for effort.  (Sorry! I couldn’t resist that one.) As always, bear in mind that every woman is different and just because the A-spot is a hot zone for some women, this does not guarantee that all women will enjoy direct stimulation. In fact, some women find pressure on or around the cervix uncomfortable, so communication is of utmost importance when experimenting with partnered sex play. I advise clients to explore their bodies on their own before involving a partner, as becoming master of your own domain can lead to better sexual experiences when you do decide to partner up.

Though the A-Spot is located at the back of the vagina, a long penis is not necessary to stimulate this area, as the average vaginal canal is quite short and even an index finger can be used to reach the AFE zone. While vaginal size varies greatly from woman to woman, a recent study found that the average length of the vagina is less than 3 inches. Couples can also play with different positions to access this responsive area, but should bear in mind that most women do not orgasm consistently from penetration or intercourse alone. Stay tuned for more information on how different sex positions can create diverse sensations and stimulate various areas of the genital region in an upcoming post and feel free to reread previous posts on how to touch a woman for a quickie refresher.

Until next time, have fun, experiment and always practice safer sex!

German costume analysts of the 1920s proposed a law of Shifting Erogenous Zones. Young women will always want to display a particular part of their bodies, but this display will keep moving from one region of the body to another. As one bit covers up, another becomes exposed. There are two reasons for this. The first is novelty – each new exposure is exciting because it has not been seen recently – familiarity has not yet bred contempt. The second is modesty – if more than one body zone is exposed at the same time, the impact is too vulgar. So, to keep the exposure fresh, but not too exaggerated, the erogenous zone keeps on shifting from one area of the body to another, as fashions change.

The Clitoris, A-Spot, G-Spot and U-Spot
In addition to the vaginal passage and its surrounding labia, the female genitals also boast four sexual ‘Hot Spots.’ These are small zones of heightened erotic sensitivity, the stimulation of which during the mating act helps to bring the female nearer to an orgasmic condition. They are: the Clitoris, the U-spot, the G-spot, and the A-spot. The first two are outside the vagina, the second two inside it:

The Clitoris. This is the best known of the female genital hot spots, located at the top of the vulva, where the inner labia join at their upper ends. The visible part is the small, nipple-sized, female equivalent of the tip of the male penis, and is partially covered by a protective hood. Essentially it is a bundle of 8000 nerve fibres, making it the most sensitive spot on the entire female body. It is purely sexual in function and becomes enlarged (longer, more swollen, more erect) and even more sensitive during copulation. During foreplay it is often stimulated directly by touch, and many women who do not easily reach orgasm purely from vaginal stimulation find it easier to climax from oral, digital, or mechanical stimulation of the clitoris.

An Australian surgeon recently reported that the clitoris is larger than previously thought, much of it being hidden beneath the surface. The part that is visible is simply its tip, the rest of its length – its shaft – lying beneath the surface and extending down to surround the vaginal opening. This means that, during pelvic thrusting, its concealed part will be massaged vigorously by the movements of the inserted penis. There will therefore always be some degree of clitoral stimulation, even when the tip is not touched directly. The clitoral shaft is, however, less sensitive than the exposed tip, so that direct contact with the tip will always have a greater impact on female arousal. Some women claim that, by employing a rhythmic, downward roll of the pelvis, they can create a direct friction on the clitoris tip while the male is making pelvic thrusts, and can in this way magnify their arousal, but this requires a more dominant role for the female, which is not always accepted by the male.

The U-Spot. This is a small patch of sensitive erectile tissue located just above and on either side of the urethral opening. It is absent just below the urethra, in the small area between the urethra and the vagina. Less well known than the clitoris, its erotic potential was only recently investigated by American clinical research workers. They found that if this region was gently caressed, with the finger, the tongue, or the tip of the penis, there was an unexpectedly powerful erotic response.

While on the subject of the female urethra, it is important to mention ‘female ejaculation.’ In the male, the urethral tube delivers both urine and seminal fluid containing sperm. In the female it is usually believed that it delivers only urine, but this is not the case. When there is an unusually powerful orgasm, some females may emit a liquid from their urethral openings that is not urine. There are specialized glands surrounding the urethral tube, called Skene’s glands, or para-urethral glands, similar to the male’s prostate, and under extreme stimulation they produce an alkaline liquid that is chemically similar to male seminal fluid. Women who experience ejaculation (which ranges in quantity from a few drops to a few tablespoonfuls), sometimes imagine that the extreme muscular exertions of their climactic moments have forced them into involuntary urination, but this is simply because they do not understand their own physiology. Nor, incidentally, did some medical authorities, who insisted that ejaculating women were suffering from ‘urinary stress incontinence’ and suggested operations to cure it. (One man recently sued for divorce because he believed that his wife was urinating on him, such is the ignorance of female genital activity.)

It is not clear what the value of this female ejaculation can be, as its occurrence is clearly a little late to act as an aid to lubrication. Vaginal lubrication is, in fact, carried out by the walls of the vagina themselves, which rapidly become covered in a liquid film when female sexual arousal first begins.

The G-Spot, or Grafenberg Spot. This is a small, highly sensitive area located 5-8 cm (2-3 inches) inside the vagina, on the front or upper wall. Named after its discoverer, a German gynaecologist called Ernst Grafenberg, it is sometimes romantically referred to as the Goddess Spot. Research into the nature of the female orgasm, carried out in the 1940s, led to the discovery that the female’s urethral tube, that lies on top of the vagina, is surrounded by erectile tissue similar to that found in the male penis. When the female becomes sexually aroused, this tissue starts to swell. In the G-spot zone this expansion rebults in a small patch of the vaginal wall protruding into the vaginal canal. It is this raised patch that is, according to Grafenberg, ‘a primary erotic zone, perhaps more important than the clitoris.’ He explains that its significance was lost when the ‘missionary position’ became a dominant feature of human sexual behaviour. Other sexual positions are far more efficient at stimulating this erogenous zone and therefore at achieving vaginal orgasms.

It should be pointed out that the term ‘G-spot’ was not used by Grafenberg himself. As mentioned above, he called it ‘an erotic zone,’ which is a much better description of it. Unfortunately, the modern use of ‘G-spot’ as a popular term has led to some misunderstanding. Some women have been led to believe, optimistically. that there is a ‘sex button’ that can be pressed like a starter button, at any time, to cause an erotic explosion. Disappointed, they then come to the conclusion that the whole concept of a ‘G-spot’ is false and that it does not exist. The truth, as already explained, is that the G-spot is a sexually sensitive patch of vaginal wall that protrudes slightly only when the glands surrounding the urethral tube have become swollen. Several leading gynaecologists denied its existence when it was first discussed at their conferences, and a major controversy arose, but later, when it was specially demonstrated for their benefit, they changed their minds. Sexual politics also entered the debate, when certain anti-male campaigners rejected out of hand the idea that vaginal orgasm could be possible. For them clitoral orgasm was politically correct and no other would do. How they have reacted to the recent marketing of ‘G-spotter’ attachments for vibrators is not recorded.

Astonishingly, there have been recent reports that some women have been undergoing ‘G-spot enhancement.’ This involves injecting collagen into the G-spot zone to enlarge it. According to one source, ‘One of the latest procedures to catch on is G-spot injection. Similar substances to those injected into the lips to plump them up can now be injected into your G-spot. The idea is that this will increase its sensitivity and so give you better orgasms.’ This sounds more like an urban myth than a surgical reality, but where female sexual improvements are concerned, almost anything is possible.

The A-Spot, AFE-zone or Anterior Fornix Erogenous Zone. Also referred to as theEpicentre, this is a patch of sensitive tissue at the inner end of the vaginal tube between the cervix and the bladder, described technically as the ‘female degenerated prostate.’ (In other words, it is the female equivalent of the male prostate, just as the clitoris is the female equivalent of the male penis.) Direct stimulation of this spot can produce violent orgasmic contractions. Unlike the clitoris, it is not supposed to suffer from post-orgasmic over-sensitivity.

Its existence was reported by a Malaysian physician in Kuala Lumpur as recently as the 1990s. There has been some mis-reporting about it, and its precise position has been incorrectly described by several writers. Its true location is just above the cervix, at the innermost point of the vagina. The cervix of the uterus is the narrow part that protrudes slightly into the vagina, leaving a circular recess around itself. The front part of this recess is called the anterior fornix. Pressure on it produces rapid lubrication of the vagina, even in women who are not normally sexually responsive. It is now possible to buy a special AFE vibrator – long thin and upward curved at its end, to probe this zone.

Students of female sexual physiology claim (perhaps over-enthusiastically) that if these four erotic centres are stimulated in rotation, one after the other, it is possible for a woman to enjoy many orgasms in a single night. It is pointed out, however, that it takes an extremely experienced and sensitive lover to achieve this.

It has been claimed that two out of every three women fail to reach regular orgasms from simple penetrative sex. As mentioned above, most of them find that only digital or oral stimulation of the clitoris can be guaranteed to bring them to climax. This must mean that, for them, the two ‘hot spots’ inside the vagina are not living up to their name. The reason for this, it seems, is monotony in sexual positioning. A group of 27 couples were asked to vary their sexual positions experimentally, employing postures that would allow greater stimulation of the two vaginal ‘hot spots,’ and it was found that three-quarters of the females involved were then able to achieve regular vaginal orgasms.

All about the G-Spot (and the A-Spot, the O-Spot...)
How long does it take to bring a woman to climax?

Well, it depends, but if you’re really serious about doing it, and doing it right, you should be doing it for at least 20 minutes. That’s if you’re using your tongue, a certain way, in a sustained fashion, and hitting the right spots. And yes, I said spots. Because there’s more than just one zone you should shoot for, and they’re not all between her legs. Of course, anyone who’s an expert in the four-spot-method will be familiar with that ...

Ok. I’ll rewind.

Ladies and Gentlemen.

Have you heard of the A-Spot, the O-Spot and the Deep Vaginal Erogenous Zone? Are you familiar with the four-spot method? Do you enjoy orgasms that last? Do you enjoy orgasms at all?

If you’re a straight woman, chances are you’re less likely to report orgasming as much as the men you have sex with. There is, unfortunately, less research on lesbians, but I’m going to assume they’re perhaps a little more satisfied than many of their hetero sisters. Even so, I wonder whether lesbians are any more informed than straight men and women about the various yum-buttons mentioned above. And I might mention the fault does not necessarily lie with a lack of trying – we all know good lovers love to please. However there are many sexually frustrated people out there and a lack of orgasmic accomplishment has a lot to do with it. More on that later.

First, let’s get back to the four-spot-method, something I’ve only recently learned thanks to a session spent boning up on a sexual phenomenon dubbed ‘ESR’.

What is ESR you ask?
Simply, it is Extended Sexual Response. It’s a female sexual response, it is a relatively rare response, and, importantly, it is a learned response. Essentially, ESR is a fancy way of saying the best sex you’re likely to have in your life. Women who have ESR are likely to have certain characteristics, and there are certain ways of helping achieve ESR. And the good news is it’s all linked to a body of research that shows men can orgasm better too (yes fellows, there’s more to it than a shudder and squirt).

According to the study that has, er, most recently aroused my excitement, ESR is preliminarily defined as “being able to attain long lasting and/or prolonged and/or multiple and/or sustained orgasms and/or status orgasmus that lasted longer and more intense than the classical orgasm patterns defined in the literature”.

And when I say sustained I mean orgasms that last anywhere up to, and over, 10-15 minutes.

How does that compare with the orgasms you enjoy, or the orgasms you’ve elicited?

If you can relate as a subject, then you’re probably a woman who exhibits some of the ten characteristics identified as ESR contributors such as a high libido, sensitive erogenous zones beyond the clitoris, regular masturbations and erotic fantasies, and strong pelvic floor muscles (who else is doing their Kegels now?). You may also be using some sex toys and sexual novelties, and have experienced sexuality with “very knowledgeable partners who can maintain sexual intercourse for more than 30 minutes or more in more than 50% of their sexual encounters.” (Yes please).

And if you’re relating as subjector, then you may be one of the aforementioned sexual partners, and so might also already be familiar with the four-spot method. (If that is you, I apologise. If it isn’t, or if you’d simply like a refresher, please read on).

The four-spot-method, as outlined in this research, is strongly aligned with the achievement of ESR and goes like this:

“The male partner uses his left hand’s second and third fingers to stimulate the G-Spot upward, fourth finger of the left hand is used to stimulate anus. The head is in between the legs of the woman to perform cunnilingus, which should be continued for at least 30 to 40 minutes, with up and down continuous movements of the tongue (1-3 Hz). The right hand should be stimulating the left nipple of the women. Thus anus, G-Spot, glans clitoris, nipples are stimulated at the same time until she reaches a series of orgasms, which may last for more than 2-5 minutes. In between these stimulations, rotating probe and vibrating vibes can be used to stimulate the deep vaginal erogenous zones (DVZ).”

... so in other words, the four-spots relates to multiple erogenous zones, and the method relates to, well, a lot of real hard work. Which begs questions about whether you’re likely to achieve ESR with anyone beyond a committed sexual partner, whether ESR is, y’know, really all that practical, and whether most women would actually feel comfortable being twisted and rubbed and fiddled with thus.

Practicality and partners aside, the question about comfort is an important one. Especially when you consider how often we’re told women struggle with orgasm, women struggle with their sexuality, women struggle with their bodies. There’s a great bout of dialogue in Chasing Amy(yes, I really did love that flick) between a straight guy and a lesbian lady about why it was so many women hate getting head – read: “because of the smell-thing!” And it’s a legitimate point to make, when you consider the very many, very strong social cues about how gross the natural functions of female bodies can be (see ‘vaginal discharge’, see ‘the male fear of menstruation’, see 'tightening cream’). I certainly can relate – it’s taken me quite some timeto grow accustomed to the way things work, to set aside my squeamishness about the sounds and smells and sights involved with the pursuit of fleshy pleasure and just, well, freaking enjoying.

Which is probably why I think it’s important to briefly raise some recent science on sex and disgust in relation to this conversation (we've covered disgust before). For any woman or man who has ever felt inhibited by things they may consider to be ‘disgusting’, please read about this idea what is ‘gross’ may be less so in sex ... something we might want to consider in relation to my earlier point about orgasmic accomplishment.

But of course, orgasms aren’t the point of sex. We should note that sex is still just about making babies for some people. For others, it’s a nice way to be close to people you love, and minds don’t need to be blown every time. And some people use sex negatively – as a power tool, or as food for a deep insecurity. What’s important to remember is that sex is vast and complex, and it can be beautiful and it can be ugly.

It should always be consented to, and it should always be pleasurable, for both partners, at the very least.

I wonder, how many of us can say so much is true?

Do you enjoy a satisfying sex life? Do orgasms feature? Are you willing to work for your rewards, or do you think people take sex and so forth a little too seriously?

Hitting the Spot: A-Spot Stimulation
Hopefully, you are already versed in the enormous pleasures that can result from G-Spot stimulation, but what about the almighty A-Spot?

What is the A-Spot?
Short for the anterior fornix, the A-Spot lies deeper in the vaginal canal than the G-Spot does, but is in a shallower zone than the posterior fornix. The simplest means of describing its location is that it’s located directly before the cervix. Like the G-Spot, it resides on the front portion of the vaginal canal, as in facing the bellybutton.

Some women find the sensation of cervical massage to be uncomfortable, while others simply can’t get enough of it. It’s a personal preference which should always be discussed before a surprise cervical slamming.

Large Penises and the A-Spot
Men with large penises have no trouble reaching the cervix, as the average female vaginal canal is between 4-6 inches long. Generally, the more aroused she is, the longer the canal becomes. So, extra foreplay can be very helpful for those more ample gentlemen, while it can be a hinderance to those who are not quite so lengthy. To extend to canal, try using these ‘Cunnilingus Tips, Tricks & Techniques.’

For men with a large penis, wrap it up in a Durex XXL or Magnum XL and give it a whirl. Typically, positions where you’re facing one another work the best, but since pensises come in all sorts ofcurvy shapes, this may differ from couple to couple. You’ve got the advantage of being able to feel her with your tip, so you’ll have a better grasp of where you are in relation to her cervix.

A-Spot Stimulation for Others
For women who are masturbating, for women who have sex with women, or for a partnership in which the male isn’t long enough to reach this exciting anatomical feature, there is no need to despair or to give up hope of ever reaching the A-Spot. Fingers and smaller penises aren’t typically long enough for this precise task, but the employment of a toy can do the trick. Check out “The 5 Best Dildos for Size Queens” for some great larger sized insertables.

Because toys have no nerve endings, it can be difficult to tell exactly where the toy is nudging without a little guidance. If you begin with manual sex (fingering), first identify the G-Spot. Even with gloves or finger cots, feeling the raised ridged texture of the G-Spot should be easy enough. For more information, read ‘What and Where is the G-Spot?’

Once this is located, make a mental note and grab the toy of choice. I recommend a toy that is around 5.5” or more for A-Spot stimulation. Remember, there needs to be enough toy leftover for you to hold onto, even when things get buck wild and really slippery. Using one such as the LELO Gigi is ideal. Insert the toy and move past the G-Spot that you just located.

How To: Reaching the A-Spot
If you feel a distinct pop, you’ve gone too far and you’ve reached the posterior fornix. Back it off a notch and try again. First feel for the G-Spot and then maintain pressure towards the front facing wall of her vaginal canal, while slowly increasing the penetrative distance. Maintain an angle towards the belly button. Some people find that pressing down on the lady’s lower belly at this point can provide extra sensation.

Of course, using a high quality lube like Probe Thick & Rich can help ease the friction and promote ease of deep sliding action at this juncture. You don’t want to attempt hitting the A-Spot without plenty of lube.

This is a great technique to learn while masturbating, so that you can help guide your partner along to the A-Spot. Sometimes communication can be the best tool for the job. So, when in doubt about her A-Spot, simply ask her!

“A-Spot” in the Vagina
When it comes to pleasing a woman, many people are aware of the clitoris and the g-spot but it’s come to my attention that not many know about the A-Spot.

What is the A-Spot? aka: anterior fornix erogenous zone, AFE or the epicentre.  It is sometimes even referred to as the second G-Spot. It is an erogenous zone of the female anatomy that can lead to vaginal wetness, arousal and when stimulated for a continued period of time it can lead to an intense orgasm.

What does it feel like? The A-Spot is a patch of sensitive tissue at the inner end of the vaginal tube between the cervix and the bladder.

Reaching the A-Spot may also facilitate a female ejaculation, or as some people call it, “squirting” because it is right by your urethral sponge which fills with liquid as you’re turned on, and releases if you ejaculate.

To reach the A-Spot while fingering: Place both index and middle finger inside of the vagina, and keep your thumb out of the vagina, up as if you’re giving a thumbs up. Doing this will allow your fingers that are inside of her vagina to be close to the vaginal wall, thereby stimulating the G-Spot and hopefully the A-Spot simultaneously.

To reach the A-Spot during sex: In order to reach the A-Spot during sex with your penis, having the woman on top, with her belly touching yours is usually best for this type of penetration. Reverse cow-girl is also a great position for reaching the A-Spot as well.


My apologies for the bush above, but this photo was most accurate.

The A-Spot is located further up inside the vagina from the G-Spot, making it harder to reach. Nothing good comes easy right? Orgasms that are achieved through stimulation of the A-Spot are distinctly different from a clitoral orgasm, and most women say that it’s much more intense. This makes sense since it isn’t massaged or stimulated as often as the G-Spot and clitoris, so when it is, it’s comes with an intensified reaction.

Women also explain that an orgasm from stimulating the G-Spot and the A-Spot differ in sensation based upon each individual. Some women say that an A-Spot orgasm is more intense, while some women say they can’t tell the difference. It’s also important to understand that regardless of how big your penis is, how long it is or how big your hands are, climaxing is not easy.

Some women have experienced just a clitoral orgasm, or orgasms from just the G-Spot or A-Spot; some women haven’t experienced any type of orgasm at all. When it comes to vagina’s and orgasming, it’s kind of like “Goldie Locks and the Three Bears”, you have to keep trying different things until you find one that fits just right!

Often times after a clitoral orgasm women experience post-orgasmic sensitivity, which makes touching the vagina a bit uncomfortable. Kind of like how the tip of the penis is extremely sensitive to touch after cumming. While the clitoris may be over-sensitive after an orgasm, A-Spot orgasms can produce very strong orgasmic contractions, however even after climaxing, women do not suffer from over-sensitivity.

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